On and on

But we all need to move on. We can't carry everything with us. It would be too burdensome to be carrying all the stuff we have especially those of no use to us anymore; or those that might cause harm to us. If life is a journey, we have to travel light....

I read these gentle words from a friend's blog. It made me think, I must be carrying so much from the past that makes it hard for me to move on. I still carry my grudges, the pains, angst... As much as I've wanted to believe that letting them go would make my life a bit easier but they've been a art of my emotional strain ever since the people who caused them gave them to me. That is where I get my emotion, without it I am existent but emotionless, a body with a mind but no heart. I bring my memories wherever I go, whether they are bad or good. They either turn me to stone or to a live human, should I chose now what to leave behind?



Physics lecture class is not getting any fun. I came to class on the second day and mathematical equations welcomed me. Do I deserve to relive such nightmare? What have I done that I am being punished for? Waaah! Anyway, I will finally learn how to make a professional website. I have a subject on Internet/ Web Application Development. The only problem now is having Sir JC Ribo as professor. I can pass if I focus but remembering what I had to go through just to fail JAVA Programming, having him in front of the class is pretty distracting. I just pray that I could survive, help me, God.



My reason: No matter how much you love something, when it doesn't give out the best in you anymore and it doesn't make you happy anymore like it used to, it's just not worth going through anymore. I guess I'll have to find myself another one, band that is. Paalam, Ewige Sorge.



I'm still desperate, wondering where Cogie is. You have no idea how much longing I'm feeling right now. Nasa'n ka na? Lumilipad na si Captain Barbell suot ang mukha ni Richard Gutierrez at kung 'di dahil kay Annabelle, si Cogie sana ang lumilipad ngayon suot ang costume ni Captain Barbell. Wala pa rin balita tungkol kay Cogie kahit sa'n, galing kahit kanino. Kung alam nya lang na may isang nilalang na di nya kilalang naghihintay sa pagbabalik nya. Inaasam na makilala sya at makita sya kahit sa telebisyon lang. Sana may paraan para matupad ang pangarap kong ito. Pag natuto na ko ng paggawa ng website, igagawa ko sya ng site at lalakarin ko para maging official yun para sa pagbalik nya malaman nya kung gaano ko sya kamahal. Di po ako obsessed. Ganito lang ako magmahal. Kung alam nya lang *sigh*.



I had a weird dream some time last week. Imagine a Backstreet Boys concert in a grandstand, packed food teeming with cobwebs and spiders, Kong, Jerome and the gang, A giant crocodile bridge, and me running everywhere. It just doesn't make sense.



Hanggang hindi pa tayo nagkikita, mangangarap muna ako...