Stormed in

Wednesday. The rain falls on me like water from heaven. I was soaking wet but I didn't mind. It brought me memories of someone I used to share it with. I can never forget how he would hold me close so we could share an umbrella or how we both ran into the rain because nobody brought an umbrella. The stormy winds felt good on my face. It cleansed me and reminded me of things I usually forget like when I usually say to my self that I don't tolerate pain simply because I hardly tolerate feelings. I refuse to be ordinary and with that I refuse to be human. Thank the heavens for the gift of rain, it washes back what I throw away.



Thursday. I was literally stormed in. Classes were suspended and spent the almost all day asleep. It was good that the storm saved me from taking that horrible Physics exam but I didn't get to give my friends/ former blockmates the letter I wrote for their Retreat today. This was supposed to be the last Retreat I'm going to with my friends but it's never going to happen now. I made my choice, and I had to leave. The day went on and night came with the sky rumbling above my head but it doesn't really worry me. I woke up that day with a beautiful dream. He was here, in my house. My Red Sunday was here, we were friends and we were happy. But that was just a dream. To think that I've only had him once or twice in my dreams and never actually met him, my intuitively introverted unconscious mind must be telling me that the day is near that I am going to meet him. I'm still waiting and I will never stop.



Jealousy is storming me. It's about Red Sunday again. Let me call him that because I can't stand people ridiculing me about my feelings on someone who's totally out of my league. If you've been reading my blog, you would know who he is. Okay. I'm thinking of him, as usual, and he's rumored to be this singer girl's boyfriend, and I get this feeling that they're really together and happy. I have no news about him and I have no interest in getting any news about her unless it involves him. Dreaming to be his girlfriend is far too much, all I wanted is to meet him and be his friend. I always say that. I want to tell the world someday that I KNOW HIM. When is that ever going to happen? Aw! I also think he's the one she wrote songs for and they're all about him. Hey, I can sing too and I can write poems & songs too but the difference is.. we've never met, he doesn't know such a lonely creature like me exists and I'm not her. Heck!? Am I dreaming dreams or what? Or what! Haha.. I'm so pathetic!



Maybe next time, I'll post happier thoughts but this time let me do one of things I do best... EMOTE!